Refiner's Fire

There's a courage that is forged in pain
There's a purpose in the furnace flame

~Live Alive by Rend Collective 

Within the Bible there is much imagery dedicated to gold and silver being purified in fire. Just as smelters seek to rid precious metals of their impurities, the Lord seeks to purify the hearts of His followers. God desires to strengthen the faith of believers and draw them closer to Himself. 1 Peter 1:6-7 seeks to illustrate this point by stating, "In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith -- more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire -- may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ." In light of this Scripture, and looking back on 2016, I very much believe that I spent the year in God's forge.

To impersonate Sophia Petrillo, "Picture it! Galilee, PA: February 2016." It was my least favorite month of the year and the gloom of winter was causing my mind and thought processes to spiral downward. For those who don't know, I struggle with anxiety and depression that can either be general, circumstantial, and almost always seasonal. If I'm diligent in prayer, I can usually catch myself and hold off the downward spiral. But other times, like last winter, my mind can become its own worst enemy and I can create problems that don't actually exist.
Being an introvert, I'm very observant and attuned to patterns, and I had convinced myself that a particular pattern in communication had become fractured. Instead of dealing with this situation rationally, I allowed my anxiety to take a stranglehold on my life. I believe that the best description for the mental sabotage i endured can be found in Zach Eswine's book Spurgeon's Sorrows. In it he states, "Though none of the bad things we imagine have happened to us, we 'convert our suspicions into realities and torture' ourselves with them in our own imaginations." And as Spurgeon himself declared, "On the very slightest turn of circumstances we begin to fret." Believe me when I tell you that it's not a fun place to be in mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. For anyone who has either experienced this personally or had a friend struggle, you'll know that an unfortunate byproduct of anxiety and depression is anger, and that was the next phase of my year.
At this point, I opted to go on a disaster relief trip for a change of scenery in the hope that this would cure my inner turmoil. While I was able to mask my struggles during the day for the most part, during my alone time the internal battle continued to rage and I began pleading with God to make me well. I was very aware that I was starting to lash out at close friends and couldn't figure out how to stop and just chill. I could totally relate to Anna Kendrick in her book Scrappy Little Nobody where she admitted, "The real problem is that I let my anxiety cripple my relationships." It was agonizing to notice shifts in friendships and painful to realize that my behavior was the most notable cause for the shift.
For the longest time I couldn't recognize the purpose behind my struggles. Thankfully God knew they were necessary to strengthen my resolve in order to minister to others while I dealt with the so-called trainwreck of my mind. Looking back to May, there was a particular morning that I was rather anxious and a chaplain pulled me aside at breakfast to pray with me. You know it's getting bad when the chaplains make a beeline for you. The blessing, though, was that I ended up working at the home of a woman who struggled with anxiety that bordered agoraphobia. I felt that God had placed me there specifically, so I took the time to share music with her, along with letting her know that it was okay to be frustrated and that there is an entire book in the Bible where the author voices his frustrations, which is aptly titled Lamentations. All of this was discussed while we carefully went through her closet looking for and thankfully finding the deed to her house. At the end of the day, another chaplain, who happened to be a trained counselor, expressed how he struggled to see past the clinical aspects of this homeowner's anxiety, but I was there in a capacity that allowed me to relate to her through shared experience. That was one of the few times all year that I felt like I had a purpose and that God was using my struggles to benefit others.
Although I came to this realization, I still endured a summer plagued with anger and negative thought processes. There were some notable bright moments spent with friends watching soccer, but I remained consumed by things that had gone wrong and yearned for my life and friendships to be restored to how they were in previous months. I forgot that change is inevitable and God had His own plan. He desired for me to focus solely on Him and in order to do that, certain aspects of my life needed to be refined and idols discarded. It wasn't until August that I finally began implementing some of these changes, which included taking better care of myself mentally and spiritually. This involved rearranging my work schedule so that I could finally make it to church on Sunday. This in turn gave me an opportunity to stop by work on my way home from church to share what I had learned during the sermon.
Through all of this, I finally recognized that God had protected me during certain events and kept me out of particular circumstances. He also made me keenly aware of the blessings He bestowed on me. The most apparent blessings came in the form of friends and fellow believers who desired to minister to me, pray for me, and help restore my lost joy. I'm thankful that I finally recognized the purpose for walking through God's refining fire this past year. I've taken to heart James 1:2-3, which states, "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness." Without facing trials, I may fall prey to thinking that I can do life without relying on God. Through my many trials, though, I've drawn closer to God, restoring my loyalty to Him, with a renewed desire to stand for my faith.

When Truth is No Longer Accepted

Currently, there are numerous debates in the news between what is right and wrong. Many of these discussions focus on the "rights" of Americans and what should be regulated by the government. Everybody seems to have an opinion, and those with opposing viewpoints call their opponents narrow-minded or insensitive and immediately "lose respect" for anybody who refuses to be openminded enough to share their opponent's viewpoint or beliefs. I wish people would take a second to actually sit down and listen to one another, rather than hurling insults and opting to shutdown to alternative thoughts on matters. Accusations won't get people anywhere, and closing off lines of communication just because somebody has a different opinion is childish.
Part of the problem is that the modern world has lax discipline, which makes it difficult to convey definitive rights and wrongs to people. Sure, I could sit down with somebody and explain why they need a Savior, but if they don't believe they have ever done anything wrong and believe they are generally a "good" person, they will never accept Jesus into their hearts or believe in the teachings of Christianity. This is what happens when relativism seeps into the belief system of the majority. The defined lines between right and wrong get lost in the murky mire of personal beliefs. Along with that, too often Christians don't want to offend others, so they sway away from the definitive truths outlined by God in the Bible. Rather than accept God's authority on all matters, some opt to just let people be happy as long as it doesn't impact them. When this happens, it reflects what was expressed in Isaiah 26:10, which says, "If favor is shown to the wicked, he does not learn righteousness; in the land of uprightness he deals corruptly and does not see the majesty of the Lord." This is why discipline and teaching ones children is so important. If parents opt to be friends with their kids instead of having authority and disciplining them for their actions when necessary, they will never learn that certain actions are in fact wrong. Proverbs 22:6 expresses the importance of discipline by stating, "Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it."
What's unfortunate is that the typical response to a Christian trying to convey biblical truth is calling them hateful bigots who don't love their fellow man and are trying to shove their beliefs down other's throats. It's often misconstrued as Bible-thumping because nonbelievers do not understand that Christians answer to God, not our fellow man. In Matthew 28:20, God calls us to "teach them all that I have commanded you." Not all of humanity acknowledges the authority of God and the truth He speaks, which causes friction. I understand that, but if we show favor to those who are in the wrong, they will never understand or accept the truth. Allowing someone to continue on in their sin without acknowledging the eternal consequences in the opposite of love. I know it is not my job to judge those outside the church (1 Corinthians 5:12), but it is my duty to expose the darkness in the world, as per Ephesians 5:11, which says, "Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them." I myself struggle with ways to do this in a loving manner, but I know in my heart that speaking the truth in love is more important than gaining favor with man. I must pray for courage to talk to people and ask the Holy Spirit for the words to express my concerns to people in my life. I doubt this will happen overnight, but my hope is that I will be emboldened by the Spirit to speak the truth in love.
I must remember that there are only two options after death: eternal life and eternal condemnation. Reading Galatians 6:8, which states, "For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life," illuminates that fact, which should serve as my motivator to sow seeds to be watered in the hopes that Christ will pluck them out of the darkness. I cannot just sit back and rest on my laurels, not expressing my concern to those living lives contrary to truth just because they feel it is right. I must be willing to take a chance and express the truth in love. It may cause some riffs and I might lose favor with some, but it's a chance I must be willing to take. You never know who just needs to hear the Gospel in a new light. God can soften hearts in those you least expect it, so trust the Holy Spirit to guide you. I will do my best to do the same. The least we can do is try in these dark times so that as many people as possible have the opportunity to accept Christ in their hearts and have eternal life.

If you have any interest in reading another post based on relativism's impact, feel free to read The Prevailing Age of Skepticism and Moral Degradation

W.A.I.T. Part 13: Do You Attract Moths or Bats?

With summer approaching, I think of the times I have watched moths dancing around a porch lamp or a campfire. They are completely drawn to the light, to the point in which they are occasionally consumed by their interest and desire to be close to the light. This desire to draw close to the light should be how Christians react to Jesus. We should have a desire to draw closer to the light of Christ so that he might shine through us. A good self check on whether you are thriving to shine with the light of Christ, or whether you are living in darkness, can be found in Luke 11:33-36: "'No one lights a lamp and puts it in a place where it will be hidden, or under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, so that those who come in may see the light. Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eyes are healthy, your whole body also is full of light. But when they are unhealthy, your body also is full of darkness. See to it, then, that the light within you is not darkness. Therefore, if your whole body is full of light, and no part of it dark, it will be just as full of light as when a lamp shines its light on you.'" This is reminiscent of the new song by Kari Jobe, entitled "We Are." The chorus of this song states, "We are the light of the world. We are the city on a hill. We are the light of the world. We gotta, we gotta, we gotta let the light shine." It is our job as Christians to shine as beacons for Jesus in order to guide the lost to Him and glorify our Father in heaven.
On the other hand, a winged animal that completely avoids the light, but prefers to come out in darkness, is the bat. Bats can always be found sleeping in the rafters of homes during the day, only to come out at night when it is utterly dark. Sure, these are nocturnal animals, but it reminds me of John 3:19-20, which states, "This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed." There are many in the world who are afraid to have their pasts exposed, so they flee from God. Instead of realizing that Jesus is the only one who can bring healing and forgiveness, many assume they will be harshly judged for their actions. As Christians, we must help to alleviate this misconception in order to allow others to be drawn to the light of Christ.
Christians must also be aware of some warnings that are found within the book of 1 John. These warnings should help Christians to focus on whether or not they are honestly drawing closer to Christ and reflecting Him in order to thrive. 1 John 1:6-7 tells us that "If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin." We cannot claim to be walking with Christ if we are deliberately sinning and choosing to not change our ways because our personal desires trump our desire to live a life pleasing to God. The other verse to be aware of is 1 John 2:10-11, which says, "Anyone who loves their brother and sister lives in the light, and there is nothing in them to make them stumble. But anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness. They do not know where they are going, because the darkness has blinded them." I'll admit that this is a verse that I need to remember and focus on some days. I don't necessarily have outright hatred for any of my brothers and sisters in Christ, but I'll admit that I can get rather frustrated with people in certain situations. When I find myself in those moods, I think it's important for me to reflect on the fact that I'm not reflecting Christ if I am seething over a silly situation or misinterpretation. A song that helps me during these difficult times in my life, and serves as a good reminder of how to thrive in the light is "Spark" by The City Harmonic. The opening of the song goes like this: "Could a spark of Your love light a fire in me? Just a spark, warm my cold heart. It's the living that breathe."
If you find that you are living more in the realm of darkness, take your cue from Paul when he spoke to the church in Ephesus. In Ephesians 4:17-19, Paul said, "So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they are full of greed." We are to flee from darkness and into the arms of Christ. The closer we are to Him, the more closely our actions will mirror His and bring God glory.
So after analyzing your current life situation and your day to day lives, are you attracting frantic moths or do you have bats in your belfry? My hope is that you are attracting moths because that means that your relationship with Christ is growing and thriving, which is glorifying your Father in heaven.