Leading an Unconventional Life

I wanna be Your hands & feet
I wanna be Your voice every time I speak
I wanna run to the ones in need
In the name of Jesus 

I wanna give my life away, all for Your kingdom’s sake
Shine a light in the darkest place
In the name of Jesus

~Send Me Out by Fee

I'm not one that typically conforms to society. This might be more apparent on the days that I decide wearing neon colors is a remarkably good idea. But it's also true when it comes to decisions that I've made about how to lead my life for the past year and a half. I've applied and interviewed for jobs within the field of exercise physiology, and even for a soccer statistics position, but still have not obtained that "real" job that some people insist on questioning me about. I'm not saying that I will never use the degree I earned in college, but I do believe that at this point in time, I'm not meant to utilize it. God certainly has different plans for how I conduct my life. Although I occasionally wish that I led a "normal" life like everybody else, I think I have finally realized that I'm meant to live unconventionally. I'm that square peg that won't fit into the round hole of life.
Two weeks ago I found myself sitting in the Best Buy Theater in Times Square hoping to hear Brian Houston preach at Hillsong. As fate would have it, Carl Lentz was actually leading the 12:30 service, but what he spoke about was something that I really needed to hear, especially heading into a Samaritan's Purse rebuild. At some point during the message, Pastor Carl mentioned how we all need to stop being so focused on the cultural view of success and rather focus on the biblical view of success. Pastor Lentz said that if we compared Jesus against the cultural view of success, it would appear that he was an abject failure, when in all honesty, Jesus was successful beyond anybody's wildest dreams. He also emphasized that God's plan is typically contrary to our earthly plan and that we needed to start viewing God's interruptions as invitations.
After the sermon, I began thinking about my own life. While I enjoyed success in the cultural sense during college, ever since I graduated, God has been interrupting and shaping my life to fit His plan as opposed to mine. To outsiders, I might appear to have failed because I don't hold a full time job, which is why I choose to focus on what the Bible says, as opposed to what the world says. If you look at Matthew 4:19-20, it states, "And he said to them, 'Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.' Immediately they left their nets and followed him." This is the scene where Jesus called Simon Peter and Andrew to be disciples. It's remarkable how they demonstrated obedience to Jesus by opting to leave their careers in order to follow him. This passage has reassured me about my decision to essentially sacrifice my career in favor of continually returning to the campground I have worked at since the summer of 2008, along with volunteering with Samaritan's Purse when I am able.
Culturally speaking, this seems like a crazy lifestyle because it means that I am either living with my parents, on friend's couches, church floors, in an RV in the middle of winter, or in my car. Basing my life off of what God commands, though, I feel like I'm on the right track. I'm willing to kill the desire in my soul to be comfortable. I'm willing to answer the call to be God's hands and feet all over the country because I was created to serve those around us. Choosing to be selfless in a world that almost demands you be selfish is certainly unconventional, and I'm perfectly content with having the world feel that I'm obscure and peculiar. Sure the prying questions can become overwhelming at times, but that's when I have the opportunity to share with people that I'm content serving God through Samaritan's Purse or befriending misfits that I meet along the way. The biggest blessing is when God reveals to me that He is shining through my life into those around me. I can't tell you how amazing it felt to have someone pull me aside in a crowded bar to tell me that they think it's awesome that I choose to spend time helping others and that my life is cool. This happened to me last week and I totally gave God all the credit because I had only made two passing comments in the matter of six hours about Samaritan's Purse, and it was proof that He was shining through my life because it was a completely unwarranted complement that came hours after any mention of Samaritan's Purse.
I feel I'm one to reflect St. Francis of Assissi when it comes to evangelism. He is credited with the quote, "Preach the Gospel at all times and when necessary use words." I do not believe in berating people with what is right and wrong. I believe it is important to love people and to build relationships and trust based upon common interests that allow openings for me to share my faith. But the most important way to witness to someone is by living out your faith, not just preaching at people. Anybody can talk the talk, but not everybody can walk the walk, and the walk is way more important than the talk. (Say that five times fast)
The long and the short of it is that I believe I am currently living my life exactly the way God wants me to right now. He has created me for this moment in time to be friends with the people I'm friends with and have exposure to certain groups of people because He believes that He can make an impact through me. If that means hanging out in bars dancing to the Bee Gees, dragging canoes in the pouring rain, delivering icecream, driving drunk customers to campsites, stacking firewood, or sweeping a camp store, I'll do it because in all that I do, I am serving Jesus. This list might spark controversy for some, but I'm a firm believer in reaching those who are so greatly lost in this world. Luke 5:30-32 states, "And the Pharisees and their scribes grumbled at his disciples, saying, 'Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and sinners?' And Jesus answered them, 'Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I have not come to call the righteous but sinners to repentance.'" I am even more firmly convinced of this with the Mysteryland Festival right around the corner, which has hindered my ability to serve with Samaritan's Purse down in the south with tornado and flood cleanup. Though my heart yearned to be able to serve in those areas, I have no doubt that I'm right where I'm supposed to be working at a campground that is partnering with the facility hosting Mysteryland.
We all have different callings in life and different groups of people that we are meant to interact with to make an impact for the Gospel. Not everybody's walk will look the same because it was tailored made for a specific individual, but we should always reflect Christ in the long run because we are made in His image. To the world, my life doesn't make much sense. I'll let you in on a little secret, though. It doesn't make much sense to me either. I sometimes question what the purpose of all of it is, but I don't doubt that God has a bigger plan for my unconventional life. So I will continue to entertain the customers at the campground, go into New York City to either visit Hillsong or go to a concert with friends, and serve with Samaritan's Purse. And the next time you're confused by what exactly it is that I do, just ask questions. I'd be more than happy to go into more detail and regale you with tales of my adventures serving God. Just remember, not everything in life is supposed to make sense when measured against the cultural norms.

Finite vs. Infinite

"Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever." ~1 John 2:15-17

I don't mean to be redundant, but this post essentially is an extension of my previous post on worldliness. It seems to be something that has been weighing on my mind and heart lately, quite possibly because I've been rather aware of my own struggle as of late to focus less on what the world thinks and more about how I should live faithfully for God. It's so easy to get caught up in envy and pride these days with the ever expanding social media that makes you hyper aware of what others have and what you may not. Some desire to have the trendiest fashion sense or the most likes or followers, while others yearn to live someone else's life. I'll admit that half the reason I go on the internet these days is to see if anybody likes my tweets, blog posts, or photos on Instagram, and that's no way to go through life. It's pointless to yearn for someone's approval that is finite and could change overnight. Contentment in what we have and resting in God almost seems to be a thing of the past, and that's where we've all strayed at somepoint and got it all wrong.
This will sound silly to those who know me best, but it was through listening to Taylor Swift's "The Lucky One" that I really started to evaluate what I value most and how silly and absurd it is to desire anything from the world. This song is all about someone who moves to LA to become the center of attention, but once she succeeds, she longs to get out of town and live essentially in obscurity. When she was all over the headlines, she never understood her true worth and value since there was always someone in the wings striving to take her place. Everyone felt that the lucky one was in the spotlight, but at the end of the song, Taylor admits that the one who hightailed it out of town to spare her dignity was the one who was lucky.
I think we all need to realize the fact that trying to be the most popular, trendy, or famous person will only lead to our own self destruction. Trying to please the world is like trying to breathe with a wet blanket over your face; you just suffocate from the frustration of it all. That's because the world lies and schemes against us. It really has nothing to offer us that will quench the desires of our hearts and that's why we must continually focus on Jesus. Jesus not only is the best representation of the love we yearn for, but He is infinite and will never fade away. Just because we don't see Him doesn't mean He doesn't exist. I think that's why so many of us strive for things of the world; they appear tangible, when in reality, they are the things that are the most easily destroyed and ripped out from under us. God's love for us, once we accept Christ as our Savior, can never be destroyed, but so many refuse to trust it because it doesn't appear to be tangible. Many would rather live their lives on their terms because they think they know what is best, but that's the sure fire way to failure. There's a song by House of Heroes called "Comfort Trap" that depicts how so many of us chafe against the will of God during the sanctification process of our lives because we are still convinced that we know best, even though God created us and is the reason we are alive. The following lines really hit home with me and how easily it is to fall into the trappings of the world:

I lost my dream in the comfort trap.

I told my God his will could wait,

I've got one foot in a rich man's grave,

I heard it calling in my sleep at night,

So I killed my dream with a butcher knife,

I told my heart to toe the line,

You had all that time, the rest is mine.

I'm gonna get nice things and get my way,

Even if it means there's hell to pay,

I'm gonna have my cake and eat it too,

And what I don't eat I'm gonna force feed you,

I'm not looking for consolation,

Maybe I could settle for compensation,

Have my cake and eat it too,

And if it's all a lie I'm gonna say it's all true.

It's scary to think that people live this defiantly to God, but they do, including Christians, periodically. It's not easy to go where God calls us. We all want to do things our own way, having our cake and eating it too. And yes, we even find a way to convince ourselves we're on the right path, even when it's quite clear that we're not. It can all just lead to living one big perpetual lie because each and every day we are bombarded with opinions from worldly critics on how to conduct our lives. Everyone offers suggestions about how to get a job, save money, and live up to the American Dream. The problem is the fact that while we are striving for the American Dream, our souls are shriveling and not getting fed the living water that Christ has to offer. Every time we make that decision to listen to the world and its desires before listening to God the Father, we are taking a step away from heaven. As the verses above state, if our hearts are more consumed with worldly desires, then the love of God does not truly reside in us. It all comes down to how you choose to function on a daily basis. You can choose to strive after the things that will fade away and disappoint, or you can choose to have faith and allow God to rule your life and lead you down the right path, even if it isn't a path that is accepted by worldly standards. But that's the whole point. The life and walk of the Christian should never blend in with the world; it should always stand out and look weird. If your life looks too much like that of the popular crowd, you're probably doing something wrong in the eyes of Jesus. He was the original rebel who went against the grain of society, so we must follow suit, but not in a way that we desire to get noticed. We must go against the grain because that is what we're called to do, not because it's trendy. 

So we all have a decision to make. We can either continue to live for the finite things of this world in the hopes that they will fill the void in our hearts, or we can choose to live for God who is infinite and unchanging. It's a very personal choice and not one that should be taken lightly. My hope is that more will realize that abiding in God is the best route to take because it is the only way to ensure eternal life in heaven. It's time to stop living for what's here on Earth and instead look up to God and surrender in faith.

W.A.I.T. Part 9: Life Transformation and Associating With the World

"Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:2

Christians are meant to stand out from the world because Christians try to adhere to the Holy Spirit and not to the ways of the world. Lately, this might seem more and more difficult because Christians get such negative labels in the media and are accused of being narrow-minded. But don't let this sway you in your beliefs because you are here on Earth to serve God, not man. As the above passage suggests, we are to be transformed by the Holy Spirit and are not to conform with the world, as tempting as that may be sometimes. A lot of people try to assuage their sinfulness by claiming that everybody is a sinner and what they did really wasn't that bad. The problem with that way of thinking, though, is that you are trying to place blame elsewhere and not take Scripture seriously. In order to be transformed, we must be convicted in our hearts to abide by the Word of God. 

"When you heard about Christ and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." These words from Ephesians 4:21-24 direct us to rid our lives of the evil desires within our hearts. Without the disposal of our earthly lives in which we do as we please with no thought to the negative impact of our actions, we are unable to come into a relationship with Christ and be born again. I'm not saying that the minute you decide to be a Christian you will no longer sin; that is impossible. But once you are convicted in your heart to follow Christ and abide in the Holy Spirit, blatant and outright sin will be reduced in your life gradually because of your awareness. Those who know Scripture try to follow it to the best of their abilities, and when they stumble, they repent of the sins they committed.

To gain a better picture of what it means to live by the Holy Spirit, lets look at Galatians 5:16-25 which says, "So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit." These verses outline the desires of our sinful nature and states that we must squelch these thoughts and desires, which is no easy task. With the acceptance of Jesus in our hearts, though, we gain the ability to slowly follow the ways of the Spirit. Over time, somebody should be able to recognize the transformation that has occurred in your life once you become a Christian. If there are no hints of the fruit of the Spirit in your life though, there could be a problem. You might still be giving in wholeheartedly to your sinful nature and need to strengthen your relationship with Christ because without the desire to change and be more like Him, you never will overcome the ways of this world. 

When someone who claims to be a member of the Body of Christ still continues to blatantly sin, it is the church's job to rebuke this person so that they come to their senses. But what members of the church must remember, and unfortunately often forget, is that this rebuke of blatant sin should only be directed at those who are within the church of believers. We run into trouble when we rebuke unbelievers because that means we are not only stepping outside our "scope of practice" but we are actually stepping on God's toes. 1 Corinthians 5:11-13 says it this way: "But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who claims to be a brother or sister but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or slanderer, a drunkard or swindler. Do not even eat with such people. What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? God will judge those outside. 'Expel the wicked person from among you.'" Paul is very specific in telling us that we are to not associate with the blatant sinners within our congregations, not all of the blatant sinners outside of the church. Paul makes this point in 1 Corinthians 5:9-10 "I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people—not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world."

Life on Earth is always this careful balance of trying to live by the Spirit, but not coming off as "holier than thou" to all of the unbelievers in the world. It is not our job to judge what they do, but it is our job to minister to them in the hopes that Christ can transform their hearts. Jesus said, "'Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age,'" in Matthew 28:19-20. I'm not saying that this will be an easy task, though. The state of the world is such that relativism thrives. According to the Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy, relativism is sometimes identified as the thesis that all points of view are equally valid. When people have this point of view, it is very difficult to tell them about their need for a Savior because in their own minds, they are doing nothing wrong and don't need to be saved. Nobody likes to admit that what they are doing is wrong, but most are willing to accuse others of doing something wrong. I think C.S. Lewis said it best when he stated, "If we do not believe in decent behavior, why should we be so anxious to makes excuses for not having behaved decently?" Getting somebody to realize this could possibly help soften their hearts and open them up to hearing about Jesus. 

Again, I'll reiterate that it is wrong for us to go out into the world and condemn it for all of its actions. By doing this, we would then fit the bill of the "narrow-minded Christian quack." I'm not saying that you should agree with how the world is behaving or that you should support the desired changes some are seeking, but I don't believe that condemning people for their lifestyles or actions when they are not Christians is the path to take. I think all we can do in these situations is to try and mirror what Jesus did when he lived. Referring to Mark 2:15-17, I believe there is much to be learned from this passage: "While Jesus was having dinner at Levi’s house, many tax collectors and sinners were eating with him and his disciples, for there were many who followed him. When the teachers of the law who were Pharisees saw him eating with the sinners and tax collectors, they asked his disciples: 'Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?' On hearing this, Jesus said to them, 'It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.'" 

The best way to check yourself to determine if you are shedding your worldliness is to compare your life to the fruits of the Spirit. As long as you are making progress over time to no longer conform to the worldly points of view and desires, you are on the path to thriving as a Christian. We will all have our days when we stumble, but just remember to confess those sins and ask for forgiveness. The desire to repent for wrongs is always a good sign. Only when you find yourself being apathetic towards sin and being blatant in your sinning will you run into trouble. Also, never forget to evangelize to those around you, but be careful not to condemn the nonbelievers. It is not your job to judge, but to plant seeds. Let God be the judge of those who choose to reject Him. Instead, focus on your own life and how to thrive in the Holy Spirit.

Finding Where I Belong

Ringing in 2012, I realized how close the lyrics to Switchfoot's "Where I Belong" apply to my life. I joined friends at an Irish pub to celebrate the new year, but I just felt out of place. I'm not opposed to dancing and loud music, but I just wasn't in the mood. My friends are a lot of fun, but I always feel awkward on New Year's Eve. I think that's because my life is finally following Romans 12:2, which states, "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will." I've come to realize that I really don't conform to this world, which makes me feel a bit out of place. Most of the time I'm not bothered by this, but it seems to be exemplified on New Years. All the more reason I can relate to the following lyrics from "Where I Belong":

Where the weak are finally strong
Where the righteous right the wrongs
Still looking for a home
In a world where I belong
This body's not my own
This world is not my own
But I still can hear the sound
Of my heart beating out
So let's go boys, play it loud
On the final day I die
I want to hold my head up high
I want to tell You that I tried
To live it like a song

My goal for the new year is to embrace my non-conformity and to not let it drag down my thoughts. I need to remember that it is better to not conform to the ways of the world and that following Jesus is the  only proper way to live my life. By following the path He provides, I'm bound to discover that place where I belong.