W.A.I.T Part 7: Clouded Vision When Consumed by Self-Righteousness

"If God's the game you're playing

Well we must get more acquainted

Because it has to be so lonely

To be the only one who's holy.

It's just my humble opinion

But it's one that I believe in

You don't deserve a point of view

If the only thing you see is you."

~"Playing God" by Paramore

In today's society, it is too easy to get caught up in all the finger pointing and believing that we are right and everybody else is in the wrong. All you have to do is watch any political ad and you can see just how far we've fallen in our great nation to resort to slandering others in order to paint ourselves in a better light.  The unfortunate part is that this has crept into our everyday lives and we may not even realize it. 

Too often we focus too much on the preachings and teachings of Jesus and forget that he lived his life with a great love for the people. When we are centralized on all that Jesus taught instead of on how he lived, we gain this "holier than thou" attitude that can get us into trouble. A perfect Scriptural example of this is Matthew 7:3-5, where Jesus says, "'Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.'" We are very apt to believe that we have done no wrong in a situation, placing the blame on someone else, when realistically, both are at fault and should take notice of personal fault before pointing fingers. It is then important to meditate on Romans 3:23, which serves as a reminder saying, "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." 

We need to remind ourselves that we are not fit for the throne of God, so we must not act like it when dealing with our peers. When we begin to focus too much on the legalism of Christianity, that is when you become prone to pointing out all the wrong others around you are doing. This is much like the Pharisees who lived during Jesus' time. They were so blinded by the laws everyone had to keep and had a trumped up view of their own goodness based upon the amount of theological knowledge they possessed that they could not see their Savior when He stood right in front of them. How easily it is to lose focus on the purpose of Jesus when we focus inwardly on the knowledge we gain about His teachings and what He expects of His followers. Even the great theologian, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, fell prey to this line of thinking early on, and even felt devoid of even being a Christian yet because his vision was so clouded. There is a quote in his biography Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy by Eric Metaxas, that states the following: "For the first time I discovered the Bible...I had often preached. I had seen a great deal of the Church, and talked and preached about it - but I had not yet become a Christian...I know that at that time I turned the doctrine of Jesus Christ into something of personal advantage for myself...I pray to God that that will never happen again." It is scary to think that even Bonhoeffer could be so internally focused on his own knowledge, with a doctorate in theology no less, that he felt that he was not a Christian because he lost focus on Christ's true purpose.

What we need to turn our focus towards is the fact that God is love and that the one strict command we must follow is to love one another. If we are caught up in condemning each other for supposed wrong actions, we forget to love the people around us. Life is not supposed to be lived out by pointing out everybody's flaws and mistakes. Instead, we are called to embrace one another. 1 John 4:7-21 describes this beautifully: "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. This is how we know that we live in him and he in us: He has given us of his Spirit. And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in them and they in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister." (emphasis mine)

My wish is that more and more we will remember to love those around us. It won't always be easy because of past hurts, but God commands us to stick with one another until the very end. If we can't do that, then there is no possible way to thrive as a Christian in this dark world. 

I'm leaving you with a lyric from a song that I discovered last week, and I don't believe it was a coincidence. I played it numerous times yesterday to ingrain the concept into my brain. The song is entitled "Dark Design" and is performed by the band Among Savages. The piece that struck me and that I now hold dear to my heart is, "I would rather live with you as my friend, than someone that I was trying to condemn." 

Overlooking an Offense

"A brother wronged is more unyielding than a fortified city; disputes are like the barred gates of a citadel." ~Proverbs 18:19
"A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense." ~Proverbs 19:11

It is a natural part of life to endure disputes with your fellow man. It's what happens within society, more so than not, these days. I'm sure many of you have realized, either with close friends or family, that once somebody gets offended, it takes quite a bit of time to overlook such an incident, much like the one in the first above proverb. Man can turn into an unyielding fortress if he gets attacked in a manner that goes against his viewpoints or beliefs. The important lesson in the situation, though, is to not remain stone-cold, but to be patient and try to overlook an offense, like in the second proverb found above.

It is in our best interests to try and soften our hearts in order to get past an offense, great or small. You might ask, "Why?" and the answer is to bring glory to God. By overlooking an offense, it does not necessarily mean that you were wrong in the situation, or that how you were treated was right. It just puts you on the path towards forgiveness so that you can walk in a more Christ-like fashion. For many, this is hard because our sinful human nature always yearns for revenge. Many times we just want the other person to suffer the same pain and anguish that we felt, but that's not how we are meant to function. Instead, listen to the words found in Romans 12:17-21, "Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' says the Lord. On the contrary: 'If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.' Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." A similar version can be found within 1 Peter 3:8-9, which states, "Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing." Not only are we called to overlook an offense. We are also called to heap blessings onto the people who have wronged us. Again, this goes against our very human nature and the sinful thoughts in our mind. Too often we feel that kind gestures should only be reserved for those times when friends have been kind to us, not when they have sinned against us. The knee-jerk reaction we lean towards involves anger and revenge, but Ephesians 4:26 proclaims, "Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry." The problem with getting angry is that anger festers and only makes problems worse. The best solution is to pray and demonstrate your true colors, utilizing the stalwart character that God blessed you with, by deciding to be compassionate and blessing those who have caused you pain. This essentially helps you live out the words found within Luke 6:27-28: “'But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.'"
In my experience, emotional and verbal wounds take the most time to heal. Many seem to forget that words, whether spoken or written, can pack a punch. Other times, words morph into empty promises and hang limp like dead leaves on a tree limb because they aren't coupled with actions, or they lack follow-through. Too many times our own words get thrown back in our faces and used against us. It is times like these that are hardest for me to remember to be compassionate and loving, especially because I feel like my heart has been seared with a cattle prod. All I really want to do is rant and rave and let others know the pain I've had to endure. Deep down, I know that this won't solve anything. I know that the best solution is to try and move past the hurt in an attempt to make amends and salvage the relationship I have with the person who hurt me. But the key to overlooking an offense and putting an incident in the past is to make sure it stays there. Digging up old wounds defeats the original purpose of overlooking the offense. Proverbs 17:9 states, "Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends." In order to avoid separating close friends, bury your old wounds and throw away the key.
While reading my book Breach of Trust by DiAnn Mills yesterday, I came across the following quote: "Love involves sacrifice." This of course got me thinking about the word "love" and the scant few people I claim to care enough about to use this word to express how much I care about them. It made me question whether I have sacrificed anything for them, and vice versa. I think it made me realize that without the sacrifice, great or small, the word "love" should not be used. Now sacrifice does not mean some monumental task, like Christ's sacrifice for us on the cross to demonstrate His immense love for us. Instead, it is that moment where you analyze a situation and decide to do what is best for the other person involved, even if it is not what you want in your heart, and even if it causes great anguish in your heart and mind. In my mind, that is the demonstration of true love. It also embodies the message of this post about why it is best to overlook an offense: In order to demonstrate your love for the other person. All the more reason to take to heart this following verse:

"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." ~Ephesians 4:32

Biblical Friendship

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. 
But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. 
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?" ~Ecclesiastes 4:9-11

Anybody who has experienced life knows that it is not easy. There are always little stresses throughout the day, along with bigger issues such as financial difficulties, unemployment, relational issues, or unexpected health or car issues. Without God, we would never get through each day. We must also realize that God has blessed us with a Christian community so that we have friends to help us through difficulties we might come across on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis. Friends can provide the necessary physical and emotional love that is uplifting to the soul as we yearn to feel God's spiritual love. Friends help remind us that God does care about us and that he blesses us with others who love and care about our well-being.
It is to our own benefit to take advantage of all friendship opportunities in order to be able to handle the stress life throws at us. It is necessary to be surrounded by dependable individuals who will always have your back in good times and in bad times. If we are lucky, we find a handful of individuals who we do not hesitate to call on in any situation. Proverbs 18:24 states, "One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." These friends should be cherished like the treasures they are and should not be taken for granted.
There are a few characteristics of biblical friendship that are essential for a close knit bond; brotherly love and providing good counsel. Close friends become almost like family and we should desire to put their well-being and happiness in the same realm or above our own. This concept is outlined in Romans 12:10 ~ "Be devoted to each other in love. Honor one another above yourselves." Also, we must be open to counsel from close friends and be willing to reciprocate in times of need and in everyday life. Sometimes we find ourselves too invested in a situation and need to step back and see it from another point of view. A true friend understands your heart and will be able to discern how to best handle a situation. Proverbs 27:9 outlines the joy that can come from seeking the counsel of friends by stating, "Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice."
My advice is to cherish a biblical friendship whenever God provides one in your life. He knows the struggles that we endure, and He doesn't want us to try and be independent. God desires for us to go through life in fellowship. Remember that the best way to have a great friend, though, is to strive to be one in return.