Rejecting the Kingdom of Self

"Only when we have become completely oblivious of self are we ready to bear the cross for his sake."

~Dietrich Bonhoeffer

I've been reading through The Cost of Discipleship by Dietrich Bonhoeffer, and let me tell you, it will definitely convict you of your shortcomings and unveil any selfishness that still exists in your heart. Though it's hard and feels like a slap in the face, it's necessary in order to live with complete abandon to Jesus. Pride and self-centeredness are two great evils that must be combated in every individual so as to preserve the integrity of the Christian mission, and I'll be the first to tell you that I've been complacent in my own battle until recently.

I'm not exactly sure how it happened, and it was probably due to a myriad of factors, but at somepoint, I stopped making an effort to reach out to people and be truly concerned about what they were doing in life and what struggles they were facing. I was taking the ostrich approach to life: head in the sand to ignore what was going on around me. But by being too busy focusing on myself and all of the recent changes in my life, I forgot to use my spiritual gift of encouragement. I think in my mind I convinced myself that if I was discouraged with the path I was on, what's the point of trying to encourage someone else? And that's where I was wrong. I forgot that the Christian life is upside down and backwards, which meant that I forgot that by choosing to encourage someone else, I in turn would end up being encouraged. Selfishness will do that to you, though. It'll convince you that there's no sense being involved in somebody's life when things aren't going they way you had hoped.

It wasn't until I saw a particular post on Facebook that I had my head yanked back out of the sand. I can't remember the exact wording, or even who posted it, but it basically called for the reader to ponder how many people struggled to get through their day because the person God appointed to encourage them chose not to. In that moment, the hamster on the wheel in my brain literally started sprinting and my eyes were opened to how I was being flagrantly disobedient. Not only was I not wielding my spiritual gift, but I was ignoring other Scriptures that call for us to encourage others and be supportive of the Christian community such as Hebrews 10:24-25 and 1 Thessalonians 5:11. It also made me wonder how many times I'd potentially missed the opportunity to make a new friend because I was too busy wanting life to be all about me, rather than about Jesus and his kingdom.

As of late, I feel like I've finally returned to my old encouraging self now that I'm a little less focused on my own life and am instead reaching out to others. It honestly doesn't take that much effort, which makes me realize how selfish and complacent I had really become to not bother extending myself either via text, phone call, or any other form of communication. You, also, can easily encourage others by either going to an event a friend is participating in, streaming it online, forwarding posts that remind you of someone, patting someone on the back after they courageously share their testimony in public, or passing along information about a cause that is near and dear to someone's heart. All we need to do is burst the bubble of self and cheer on other people and we will in turn realize that we end up getting blessed by purposefully choosing to bless and encourage others.

"The inability to celebrate what God is doing in and through someone else simply reveals a profound sense of fear, insecurity, and lack of trust in a big, gracious, faithful, and loving God. If you are in your lane running your race and another person is faithfully in their lane running their race then there is no possible way that the success of one can diminish the effectiveness of another. It is God who calls us and He is good and He does good. We need to get a bigger view of God so we do not allow our own flesh, feelings, thoughts, and limitations to rule and reign. Why don't we choose to celebrate each other rather than compare and compete with each other." ~Christine Caine

Scatterbrained Ramble

I've had a lot on my mind lately, but then again, that's nothing out of the ordinary for an over-thinker like myself. I'm one of those overboard multi-taskers because I'm either easily distracted, or my mind is fueled with an obsessive need to know as much as possible at any given moment. Having your brain processing information at a million miles per hour can be a bit of a hindrance, though, especially when it comes to decision making. There comes a point when I find I have too many ideas filtering through my brain and too many options in front of me about what to do with my life. Instead of picking one and running with it, I feel like I just shut down mentally and get stuck in a rut. As Mark Batterson wrote in his book Wild Goose Chase, "'What is it you want?' I'm convinced that many of our problems are the by-products of the fact that most of us cannot answer that question. We don't know what we want. We've never defined our goals or values or passions, so we're out of touch with our heart's desires. And our growing responsibilities have numbed us to the possibilities around us and the passions within us." I don't think I could find a better way to describe the state that I'm in than that.
It's become more and more apparent that I'm going through life in a deer-in-the-headlights fashion as of late. I cringe whenever I'm asked the, "what do you want to do with your life?" question. A late night chat with my dad on the front porch a little over a week ago provided me with the beginning of a wake-up call. It was 1am and I was dealing with a bit of disappointment so I was sitting outside because that's a typical coping mechanism for me. My dad came out to keep me company and our conversation drifted to my future, which is when I began struggling to find answers for him. He then countered with this kick-in-the-teeth comment: "Well I suggest you figure out what it is you enjoy or wanna do or else you're gonna end up living the rest of your life in fear." That's the beauty of having a compassionate, yet hard-nosed German as a father; he's not subtle and doesn't beat around the bush, but gets straight to the point.
Honestly, it was just the comment I needed to fuel some more reading, thinking, and praying that might actually lead to some action from me, rather than indecisiveness. It was a reminder that I'm still living my life in a fashion that seeks glory for myself and makes me fear the opinions of others. Two pieces of Scripture that reminded me of this and opened my eyes were Matthew 10:28 and John 5:44. These verses focus on how humanity puts too much stock in the opinions, adoration, and attention received from other mere mortals as opposed to focusing on the opinion of God and giving Him all the glory. Unnecessary fear of others and their opinions can hold us back, while pride makes us turn away from Jesus, which is a sure fire way to fail in this life, and can be downright disastrous for the next.
I believe a fear that many of us have is not knowing what the future holds and now knowing God's "plan" for our lives. Too often this puts us at a standstill and we somehow stop making decisions about our lives or take any steps to progress toward a goal. It's much like this line from the song "Climbing a Chair to Bed" by the Dropkick Murphys: "Are you too afraid of living to make a man's mistakes?" Kevin DeYoung frames it nicely in his book Just Do Something in the following statement: "I'd like us to consider that maybe we have difficulty discovering God's wonderful plan for our lives because, if truth be told, He doesn't really intend to tell us what it is. And maybe we're wrong to expect Him to." The way I see it, our generation is far too distracted by gadgets and other sources of information to truly focus on God in an attempt to hear His guidance. Our focus has drifted off of God to every other tangible piece of technology or human being in front of us, possibly because we don't put much stock on the intangible, even though we might believe in our hearts that it exists. Unfortunately we're in a generation that desires and yearns for proof of everything.
For me, because of distractions and skewed focus, I've lost track of myself in the melee. Somewhere along the way I never allowed any dreams take root and lost confidence in my God given abilities. That led to a defeatist mentality, which seeped into all aspects of my life from career, to running, to my personal life. This of course kept me from developing and formulating any tangible goals in my life, leading to a rather melancholy existence. Sure, I've enjoyed the exploits from my vagabond lifestyle, but I think I fooled myself into believing I was happy with the direction my life was taking. Don't get me wrong, I love to travel and always will, but I don't want to feel like I'm just wandering through life without a destination or goal in mind. I began rethinking my life when I came across the song "Glass Houses" by The Classic Crime. It's a song that discusses how we all spend so much time building a glass house of happiness that's easily shattered once we stop putting up a front.

When the glass shattered around me

I learned a good lesson about my disorder

I thought I was happy

I said all the right things

I naively believed that my ship couldn't sink

But it did

You got hung up on the outside

Fake like you're living the good life

But death and decay on the inside

Just add pride and hate to your long list of crimes

All this keeping up with the Jones' leads us to pretend that our lives are a walk in the park and we bolster this with fake happiness and fantasies. Truth is, we're lying to everyone, including ourselves. I love how the lyricist of this song talks about how this is actually a disorder and that we're all naive to think it won't break down over time. A facade can only last so long before it begins to crumble or shatter. Most poignantly, though, is that the singer of "Glass Houses" speaks of the fact that he actually built a crystal cathedral amongst all of the glass houses.

This brings me to the first of two misconceptions I'd like to address before I close this lengthy ramble. Somehow churchgoers seem to have fallen into the trap of believing that they are not allowed to be anything but happy. Why is it that so many today feel this need to wear a mask and project false joy? Whatever happened to being able to feel the whole scope of emotions God provided us with? Not allowing ourselves to project anything but happiness because we assume that's how Christians should act totally negates the fact that the Book of Lamentations exists. Even David, a man after God's own heart, got frustrated and exuded various emotions within the Psalms. I recently saw a shirt on gratefulapparel.com that says, "Church isn't a museum for good people. It's a hospital for the broken." From my experience, broken people have various emotions and they don't have it all together all the time. We need to remember that we're allowed to express frustration, anger, and discontent as long as we don't remain in that mindset. Remember the words of Ephesians 4:26 ~ "Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger." And Psalm 30:5 says, "...Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes in the morning." Clearly we are meant to experience a myriad of emotions.

This brings me to my second point. I believe this misconception about our emotions stems from the misconception that happiness is promised to those who dedicate their lives to Christ. To be brutally honest, this is a huge fallacy. Nowhere in the Bible does God promise His followers happiness for a lifetime on this Earth. There is more emphasis placed on the fact that we are going to suffer and deal with struggles in this life. Romans 8:16-17 is very upfront and honest about this fact, stating, "The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs--heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we also may be glorified with him." Let that last part sink in a little bit. Suffering with Christ is in the equation for us to share in His glory. And the glory that Paul speaks of is not in the here and now, but in heaven. To put it bluntly using the words of Kevin DeYoung, "Life isn't always fun, and we shouldn't expect it to be." Truth is, life here on Earth is not all about us an whether or not we're happy. It's all about obeying God and allowing Him to be glorified.

Some of you might be wondering where this leaves us now and how we're supposed to muddle through life. I believe the secret is finding contentment. Paul wrote about the art of being content in both Philippians 4:11 and 1 Thessalonians 5:18. Paul wrote, "Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content," and, "Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." No matter what you're dealing with in life, if Christ is your focus, you'll find contentment wherever you're at, regardless of circumstances. Start looking for joy in the little things life has to offer and focus on the positives, rather than the negatives. As Taylor Swift sings in "Starlight," "Look at you, worrying so much about things you can't change. You'll spend your whole life singing the blues if you keep thinking that way." It's all a matter of perspective and whether or not you choose to be content with your life.

My advice to all of you is to start taking some initiative in your life and maybe listen to the song, "This is Your Life" by Switchfoot to help motivate yourself into figuring out if you're "who you want to be." Invest in your future, whether that means going to school, studying up on how you can start your own business, or actually getting that certification you've been putting off because you're cheap and lazy. Sure, you might have to change course in the future, but it's better than living a passive life, waiting for things to happen to you. That's a sure fire way to end up with regrets. Instead, put some actual thought into what your dreams could be and trust that God will be with you every step of the way, even if you aren't sure you're making the proper decision. He's in everything that you do and will work things out in the end. If you refuse to formulate some dreams and goals in life, there's no possible way to strive towards them and achieve what you desire. Take some risks and don't fear failure. Your failures will actually serving as learning experiences in the long run. And for pete's sake, stop focusing so much on what others might think of you and your goals. That will only hold you back. Keep God at the center of everything and strive to please Him with your life. But whatever you do, desire to be content rather than happy. Happiness is not guaranteed, but we all have the ability to be content no matter the situation, for blessings and struggles are all a part of God's hidden plan for your life.

Prayer is the Best Answer in Tragedy

Today, a senseless tragedy took place. At the Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, CT, a gunman opened fire and killed 26 people, 20 of whom were children. The news is still unfolding, but from what has been reported, a man in his 20s was targeting his mother, who was a kindergarten teacher, and her class. I have no words to express the anguish and sorrow I feel for the friends and families of those killed. It seems so senseless, especially with Christmas being only 11 days away.
There are many who will spend time asking why this has happened. Others will ask how this was possible. These are both valid questions, but I feel that prayer is the best way to get through a time like this. 1 Thessalonians 5:17 urges us to "Pray without ceasing," and I believe that is all we can do right now. Prayer is our open communication with God and we must ask Him for His comfort, love, and mercy for those impacted by this awful tragedy. He is aware of everything that goes on in this world, and we must make our requests made known to God. Prayer is powerful, and we must utilize the opportunity to communicate with God. Bible Gateway has provided this information on their blog, which might come in handy for prayer during this tragedy.
It's unfortunate to witness how far humanity has fallen into evil ways, and people need to pray, and as a friend of mine posted, "One thing remains the same, no one knows their number of days. Get to know Jesus people... the sooner the better."

The Necessity for Accountability

"And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all." ~1 Thessalonians 5:14

I believe a variable missing from society as a whole in America in this day and age is accountability. This concept seems to have died out with the coming of age of the American Dream. The American Dream is an individualistic, self-centered attitude based upon hard work, ensuring that nobody has to be accountable for his or her actions. Unfortunately, this is why America's infrastructure and economy now seems to be crumbling because nobody reminded anybody to save and then pay, or to even pay bills at all. Why else would individual, state, or national debt be so high?

I believe part of the reason is that nobody chose to "admonish the idle" since our concerns are focused upon self, as opposed to society. Everybody likes to blame society for all of the problems, but those same people tend to forget that they in fact are also part of the same society. We are all interconnected, whether we like it or not. No longer should we adopt the attitude of, "It doesn't involve me, so it's not my problem." Instead, God urges us to hold others accountable, but also to encourage and help those who are fainthearted and weak. If we focus inwardly on ourselves, we miss out on chances to help others who are truly in need.

Accountability has many forms. It should be used within the church in order to ensure that all the members are doing their best to maintain their walks with Christ. In the community, it could help promote honesty and concern among neighbors. Where accountability is helping me most at the moment, though, is within the sphere of running. I have not maintained a consistent running schedule since I ran my marathon last year, which has been rather frustrating. Part of me just needed a break from the sport, but part of me longed for the enjoyment of cruising along trails. Thankfully I have been blessed with someone from Bible study who has taken upon the task of holding me accountable when it comes to running. We both benefit because he is an aspiring running coach and I am in need of a more structured training regimen. Knowing that somebody will be checking in with me about whether or not I chose to run is definitely a great motivator.

I believe that if a more structured form of accountability was established within churches in America, many would put more thought behind their actions. Knowing that we will be questioned about our decisions in day to day life should help motivate people to draw closer to Christ and try to walk in a way pleasing to Him. Accountability encourages us to take responsibility in our lives and promotes caring to others within the community. I think it's about time we all tried some on for size.

Communication is Necessary in Any Relationship

"What we've got here is a failure to communicate." ~Cool Hand Luke

I think it is human nature to long to have one person in your life that you can always count on. It is natural to want to have that kind of close relationship with another person to the point that you don't even hesitate to call them when something good or bad happens in life. But that kind of relationship takes time and effort to build. One cannot expect a friend they met yesterday to drop everything to help in a crisis. It takes months or even years to build a solid relationship with anybody, and steady communication is the glue that holds the foundation of that relationship together. It would be ridiculous to assume a close bond existed with someone you only talked to once every couple months. You would be mere acquaintances at best. No, a close relationship requires communication at least once per week to remain strong. That doesn't necessarily have to be face to face, but nor can it be superficial. There must be genuine interest on both ends to set aside time for certain people who are important in our lives.

The same goes for your relationship with God. It is God's will for us to pray to Him in order to maintain a relationship, as stated in 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 ~ "Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus." In order for it to be successful, you must make time for Him on a daily basis, at the very least. Only praying to God out of necessity due to a crisis will not lay the bricks for a solid foundation on which to build a relationship. This only breeds a very inconsistent relationship with God, which lacks any true desire on your part to get to know Him and give well-deserved praise in the good times and bad. 

It is important to be open with the Lord and trust Him. Philippians 4:6-7 states, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." We seem to forget that God knows all and can help us through each and every situation if only we just communicated with Him. By neglecting your relationship with God, you are hindering your spiritual life and impeding any potential growth. Some feel that God simply won't hear their prayers. Again, this neglects the fact that God is ever present in our lives. When you begin to doubt that God doesn't hear your prayers, refer to Jonah 2:1-2, which states, "From inside the fish Jonah prayed to the Lord his God. He said: 'In my distress I called to the Lord, and he answered me. From deep inside the realm of the dead I called for help, and you listened to my cry." If God heard Jonah from inside the belly of a fish, I believe that God will hear you no matter where you are in this world. Psalm 145:18-19 can also build your confidence in the fact that the Lord hears your prayers because it says, "The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them." He is never far away from His creation and those He loves unconditionally. So we must remain steadfast and earnest in our prayer life in order to get to know Him.
What some seem to forget is that selfishness builds walls in any relationship. If you require your friends to always do what you want without ever considering their feelings or opinions, they probably won't remain your friends very long. This relates to your prayer life as well. Selfish prayers most likely will not be answered, unless God has a specific purpose behind it. The best way to pray is to mirror Jesus, whose walk was blameless and in line with the Father. As stated in 1 John 5:14-15, "This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him." All prayers and prayer requests must be made in accordance to God's will. God desires to be glorified and should be glorified, and all prayers should express that. Selfish desires with ulterior motives will not be answered and promoted. So the next time you find yourself wondering why your prayer has seemingly gone unanswered, instead of blaming God, look back at how you prayed because you are the flaw in the system. Patience is also key because God has a plan for everything and your prayers will be answered according to His time schedule, and not yours. So go and pray and build your relationship with your Father in heaven. 

Accountability, Authority, and Encouragement

Accountability is a concept that popped into my head during Bible Study on Sunday night. I'm not exactly sure why, but it might have stemmed from our discussion about how we as humans react to authority. Our study was based on Matthew 8:1-17, which discusses Christ's authoritative actions and words, along with the faithful Centurion. What was outlined was how we are all under some form of authority and held accountable for our actions. A hierarchy was created in order to illustrate this concept. Children under parents. Wives under husbands. Parents under church elders. Church elders under Jesus. Jesus under God. This gives us a sense of who on Earth we must be held accountable to, along with demonstrating how we are all accountable to Jesus and God.
As I was surfing the internet trying to gather more insight into the matter of accountability, I came across an article entitled, Accountability, by Kenneth Boa. I found the beginning quite interesting because he discusses how we are more apt to deal with issues after they arise and boil over instead of confronting them when they are relatively minor and easy to handle. One of the most striking illustrations that reminded me of my own life was when the author quoted Neil Plantinga saying: "We deny, suppress, or minimize what we know to be true. We assert, adorn, and elevate what we know to be false. We prettify ugly realities and sell ourselves the prettified versions. Thus a liar might transform 'I tell a lot of lies to shore up my pride' to 'Occasionally, I finesse the truth in order to spare other people’s feelings.'" I think we all accidentally fall into this trap of trying to spare other people's feelings as a way of avoiding confronting the real problems. Thus the reason we are called to encourage on another and hold each other accountable.
1 Corinthians 12 discusses how we are all members of the body of Christ and we must all work together and help each other. This excerpt from 1 Corinthians 12:12; 14; 18-20; 24-27 provides a decent illustration of the matter: "Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many. But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body...But God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it." This is proof that we must all work together as one body and help each other out when necessary. The notes from my NIV Life Application Study Bible stated the following: "Believers are in the world together--there is no such thing as private or individualistic Christianity. We shouldn't stop with enjoying only our own relationship with God; we need to get involved in the lives of others."
There is a distinct need to be involved in each other's lives. We are all part of one great big community in Christ and we are meant to uplift one another, along with holding each other accountable when we stray away from the Word. Now this does not mean that we point out everybody's faults and put ourselves up on a pedestal. We must kindly rebuke others, provide advice, carry each other's burdens, and encourage one another. Truth is necessary in the framework of accountability, even though it is occasionally hard to swallow. Ephesians 4:25 mentions the necessity for truth in order to maintain unity: "Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body." We are all scared to speak the truth due to the potential harm that it might cause. Sometimes it is hard for others to see your viewpoint and remaining quiet seems like the best option. Unfortunately, this tends to prolong the issue, making it more difficult to deal with down the road. This is when we must seek out advice from fellow Christians in order to figure out how to handle a problem. In the process of doing so, some of your own faults might be pointed out, and one must accept this with dignity and not revenge. Proverbs 19:20-21 discusses the importance of listening to advice and discipline when it states, “Listen to advice and accept discipline, and at the end you will be counted among the wise. Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.” Nobody enjoys being disciplined. It takes a very discerning person to humble himself in order to accept what is being said and try to incorporate the advice in order to continue following the Lord's purpose. I'm not saying that this will be easy by any means, but it is important to allow others to correct you out of love in order to rebuild what is broken.
We all struggle with sin, which occasionally blinds us to any wrongdoing in our lives. If we sense that one of our fellow Christians has stumbled, we must gently help guide them back to the right path. We are not meant to go through life on our own. Instead, we are called to help one another and receive help. Galatians 6:1-2 states, "Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." We are specifically instructed to bear the weight of other's misfortunes and grievances in order to lighten the load. This is exactly what being apart of one body in Christ and sharing in community is all about.
The foundation of any community should involve encouragement. This can help bolster morale and keep others from throwing in the towel when they are struggling and have a strong desire to just give up. I will leave you with two excerpts about encouragement. The first can be found in the book of Hebrews while the second is found in 1 Thessalonians. I hope that these will serve as a reminder to look outside your own little world and the stresses you are dealing with and turn your focus to those around you who may be struggling with the same issues or something much harder.

"And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds." ~Hebrews 10:24


"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other. And we urge you, brothers and sisters, warn those who are idle and disruptive, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient with everyone. Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always strive to do what is good for each other and for everyone else." ~1 Thessalonians 5:11-15